19.

19. Here's to another year of skipping and stumbling through this colorful, laughter-infused, chocolate-covered, coffee-stained thing I get to call life. You've snuck up on me with little warning, hardly any notice at all. Another year of acquired knowledge and new growth and loud laughter has passed, altogether incredibly quickly and yet aggravatingly slow. God has cracked my heart open and let His light pour in, and in His promise I find hope and a hunger for the future. 

18 was a year of firsts and lasts, doors opened to new hallways and rooms with incredible views. I got to give my first commencement address to my peers, I went through the highs and lows of my last year of high school. I traveled internationally for the first time, to a beautiful Jamaica, where people love one another and smile at each other and embrace the sunshine. I said goodbye to my best friends as they scattered for college, the last time we’d all live in the same place. I went cliff-jumping for the first time, befriended a sea turtle, and swam in a glowing lagoon. I released my first single, signed with my first agent, and booked my first web-series. 

19, you have a lot to live up to. I am altogether excited and terrified. Excited for new adventures and opportunities. Terrified by the fact that life and time are flying by and leaving me breathless. As young as I am, I am continuously made anxious by time; or lack thereof. Not enough time to do the things I want to, to help all the people I want to, to explore every inch of this vibrant earth. When unproductive days go by, I think of hours wasted. But I’m learning. I’m learning that everything has its season. That it’s ok to pause and breathe and take a day to lounge in the sunshine or dance in the rain.  

19, I know you’ll still bring me looks of disbelief when I tell people you’re my age. That somehow my personality and clothing and features will make me seem years senior. But, I believe you are the year of many fruitful things. I intend to put a dent in the homeless population this year, also to change the way we view beauty, and help young girls realize that there is not one singular definitition. I intend to write more and travel more and listen more. Eat the foods I’m scared of and talk to people I wouldn’t meet otherwise. Further God’s glorious kingdom and spread his message through action and in love. 

19, I welcome you with open arms.

xo,

Lo